My friend and OCD remnants

As my friend felt & endured the fury, damage and melancholy due to prolonged OCD of his kith, finally it has subsidied but aftershocks hit sporadically. My counsel to him, aftershocks after earthquake, gales after windstorm, drizzle after downpour, thunder after lightning are natural but applies to diseases, especially if it’s origin is in mind. A relapse is what shouldn’t happen to make it worse but aftershocks indicate a gradual albeit sure cessation of affliction. Hopefully planets and providence makes that happen for him. Certain things in life has no foundation, reason and is beyond mind’s comprehension which even philosophers attempted at and lost. Cyclical nature permeates everything, our raison d’être is due to this. Crests follow troughs, hence there can’t be distress once this is understood.

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How not to offer apology but salvage a situation?

Well in a recent project I was in, I pushed customer hard to get full sample & valid data for UAT testing. As I’ve noticed in all my professional project sojourns, none of the customers were able and committed to provide and always had this notion, “its ain’t my work but yours, since I pay you”. The tendency not to work and get beyond means, at the expense of dangling “payment carrot & complaint stick” together, is sickening in city state’s culture. It didn’t work in this assignment either but PM went into an emotional trap & became churlish.

I figured out a way to assuage his emotions and cool him down. What I observed was, when an emotional situation never warrants an apology due to any act of yours, can be handled deftly by a personal mail to the emotionally trapped and followed by a direct conversation hitting a middle ground. But I went on a direct route, instead an email can do the ice-breaker: e.g.

I could have been unrefined or blunt in my reply, but only in the interest to offer and receive the best for project’s success. I understand the deep dissatisfaction & inconvenience it has caused and sincerely empathize. Would like to invite for a drink (coffee/any) and toast it for project’s success and discuss ways to work synergistically in future. Talk to you soon.

VS2010

I’m really excited about this development tool for .NET 4 and its slew of new technologies. What is so exciting is Cloud and Windows Mobile 7 extensions and WPF paradigm used in building the tool for developer productivity, ease of use and UI richness. I’m for it and Mar 15 is where MIX 2010 will unveil lot’s of those in interim before full fledged product launch in April 2010. Pondering on a self help productivity app for Windows7 phones @.99¢ or .49¢ price point. Let’s see whether WPF skills can be of help in doing Silverlight apps for new Win7 phone’s UI.

Casino opens, a topic for toastmaster speech

26 Feb 2010: Casino opens its doors for preview, day one newspapers blare of petty crimes. That’s the start of social price Singapore has to pay to sustain its GDP growth. Certainly minor aberrations shouldn’t derail the train of prosperity it supposedly brings in long run with the well trumped social restraint measures in place. That’s a 2 liner summary of genesis and birth to next boom cycle for the city state that coincides with recession turnaround in the making. I did capitalize this moment, with a slick 5+ minute toastmaster speech with punches and pause, but my supposed wit didn’t fly, for my speed express of rendition went non stop, The pauses did inspire and 2 stories – a fact & fiction storyline did augur well with audience. It earned a best speaker of the day award albeit no good speakers on that day perhaps? I’m not sure. But my journey continues and need to reach top notch, certainly to Mark Twain’s, Benjamin Franklin’s and Obama’s out there. Freedom of expression is noble, its flawless delivery nobler as it requires wit, wisdom, creativity, eloquence, spontaneity and last but not least, must be from your heart to win the hearts & minds.

Fruits & means of constructive engagement in couples

Marriage as I see is the union of 2 diverse individuals who have to complement and supplement each other. After the norm, storm & form stages of marriage, no matter how much each couple earn, a smooth (yet rare occasions may be bumpy, some quarrels unavoidable no matter how you constructively disagree) relationship should be established by then, in which Mr. sets the vision, provide that outlook, ventures and brings in money as much as he could. Mrs. can always moderate his vision & mission with good analysis and provide curtailments when it goes overboard. Risk taking and genuine risk averse qualities from respective sexes have to come into play to steer family to prosperity in all spheres.

Both should contribute monetarily for the family & offspring’s growth, commensurate to their earnings. Children’s formative years need special attention & bonding to make it a life long journey. I’ve heard that if a child is with father & mother until 6-8 years since birth, his/her bonding, allegiance & togetherness is unwavering life long. Hence, even if mother is working, economics & circumstance permits, should be more attentive to children and less ambitious in her career until a child’s formative years are completed. After all, family comes first.

Sam Clemens aka Mark Twain slept with me for 43 days

Mark Twain, America’s humorist and literary genius was sleeping with me last 43 days, as I’ve to return his biography by Ron Powers, Pulitzer Prize winner, by today (28th Feb 2010) . Took that 10c fine for a day extra, to sleep with him another night. Well the wit & humor has to be contagious as his works seep in you. As a follow on, taken a couple of Mark’s books to keep him company before switching to next literary giant.

Hannibal-Orion-Jane Clemens-Washoe-Howells-Clara/Jean/Suzy–Livy Clemens-Henry Clemens (victim in boat mishap)-Horace Bixby (boat steward), Artemus Ward (reigning American humorist)-Henry Rogers-Thomas Paige — these were the characters during his lifetime.

My next target is to devour his literary works. I did hear from my father’s astrologer friend, that I won’t survive into a very old man, perhaps my guess is about early 80s. Like Mark’s premonition that he won’t survive for Halley comet’s entry, I’m not sure how I’d know my own demise but before that lots of feats remain to be achieved. Hope all decade long afflictions catapult away, leading to a dawn of a new revival in travel, artistic, entrepreneurial and intellectual pursuits and of course requisite money to cover and manage them without depleting the savings.

Vocabulary that caught my attention from bio read: menkensque, tomboy, chrysalis, virtuoso, bete noir, harebrained, balefully, phantasmic, avaricious, inimitable, corralled, lionized, deadpanned, leviathan, screed, condescension, sullen, polemics, sputtered, cadences, soliloquy, balmy, fibrillated, oeuvre, insinuated, gentrify, fawning, deification & many more but no space & time to fill them.